What's next?

Just like that, a Summer of ups and downs, adventures and experiences, and spending time with some of the most important people in my life has come to an end, and here I am, landed back in my college accommodation in Cork City. This will be my fourth and final year here in UCC, and it's so strange to think that I'll soon be fleeing this place I've learned to call home over the past few years.

Alongside the stress of final year, I've learnt, also comes the stress of figuring out "what's next?". What do I want to do with my life? Where do I want to go? What job would I like? What makes me happiest? These are just a few of the questions that I face every day, from almost every adult in my life, and also some of the questions I find most difficult to answer. It's as though my life has suddenly opened itself up for me to write my own story, but I'm experiencing some kind of writer's block.

It's not that I haven't been trying to find an answer; trust me, I have. I've tried making careers appointments, filling out online quizzes, researching graduate programmes and even asking the people that know me best what they think I should do next. The issue is, that unlike the rest of my life so far, my next steps won't involve any specific 'formula' for success like my previous had, and so I'm somewhat stumped. 

At a recent careers appointment here in UCC, my advisor tasked me with a few interesting questions. "What are you best at doing? What do you like the most?" and "What do you wish you were better at?", to name a few. I've been struggling to answer these ever since. It's as though suddenly I've forgotten these fundamental facts about myself, and I'm going to have to phone a friend.

But that's not exactly an option in real life, is it? If you lose yourself along the way, you can't just ask someone else to find 'you' again. So here I am, trying to figure it out for myself. I've returned to some of my favourite hobbies and activities in a bid to figure out who I really am, and what makes me 'tick.' I visit art galleries more frequently, take myself for coffee dates, dance to favourite music, and try to stay in touch with friends.

Despite all these efforts, however big or small they might seem, most questions remain unanswered, and I guess that's okay right now. Sometimes it can feel like you're the only person who hasn't quite 'figured it out,' and that's alright. These things just take time, so in the meantime I'm going to dedicate my time to finding myself, doing the things that I enjoy the most, and spending time with my favourite people. 

Chat soon,